Like A Redwood Seed - Stronger Than The Flames

A deeply honest look at a true American family. Poor, dysfunctional, blended, biracial, and mentally ill. This story is different from other memoirs in this genre in that I did not go on to be highly successful, famous, or even educated. A story at times ugly, raw, emotional and messy, in the truths I share and the wild extremes to which my family swung. It is also quirky, imaginative, and unusual, taking readers from the dark depths of my childhood experiences to the unique and exciting adventures of my young adulthood. A transition made possible by the chaos from whence I came.

From the cold and lonely streets of Buffalo, New York, to the wilderness of Montana and Alaska. Training Iditarod sled dogs, living among Latino immigrants, working construction in Texas summer, wildfire fighting in Idaho, and working my way across Scotland.

My life has been anything but predictable, even less what people expect from surface appearances. My experience is that most people exist in shades of grey—not a black-and-white system of absolutes where right and wrong, love and hate, are simple, uncomplicated, and self-evident. A middle-class, educated woman is not automatically a good mother. Biracial relationships are not always free of racial conflict and deep-seated bias, and all mothers are not necessarily fit to raise children. Parental mental illness leaves a lasting legacy on isolated children, and the systems intended to protect vulnerable populations fail, time and again.

A story for anyone who appreciates journeys about personal transformation and the triumph of the human spirit, that stubborn, unexplainable spark that refuses to be quenched.

Fia Sylvan is not a professional writer, simply a survivor with a minimal homeschool education and a lifelong love of reading and writing, sharing a story of one ordinary individual’s survival of, and adaptation to, extraordinary circumstances.

The hope is that this book will help change the narrative—that rising from difficult circumstances is noteworthy only when one achieves fame and power. How many of us are unsung everyday survivors, who managed to put lives and hearts back together and carry on, to live and die with our songs of strength unsung? This book is for all of you.

  Fia Sylvan is an average, lower middle-class American woman, not a professional writer, nor even an English major. She works full time and did so throughout the writing of this book, which took over 20 years to complete, due in part to the painful nature of some of the memories, as well as the vast complexities of learning how to write a book. 

Fia worked in fields as varied as healthcare, horticulture, construction laborer, professional painter, retail clerk and horseback riding instructor, in addition to the various internship jobs detailed in the book. She completed two years of college at a state trade school for her associates degree. Also took a few writing classes at local community colleges and online, over the years she worked on this book. She held a multitude of volunteer positions over the years, in addition to the two mentioned in the book. She has been involved with CAVA - Citizens Against Violent Acts, Literacy Volunteers of America, The Wetlands Conservancy, Cascadia Wild, a volunteer EMT, and currently Oregon State University Master Gardener's Association, as a Master Gardener. Her interests always wide ranging and centered around caring for her fellow beings.

Fia did not have a normal education. In and out of eight public and private schools by sixth grade, she was removed from school immediately after starting sixth, with no formal education thereafter. 

She did not set out to self-publish. She pitched to about seventy-five agents, literary agencies and publishers over the prior fifteen years and was rejected by all. Thus, after overwhelmingly positive feedback from objective readers, the journey to self-publish commenced. She expects the book is too dark, too brutal, too rough to become popular, but it is her hope that if even a handful of people are touched, enlightened or inspired, it was a worthwhile endeavor, and it is one of the biggest achievements of her life. 

Fia Sylvan is a pseudonym adopted to protect herself and others, whose lives and secrets are exposed in her book. Fia is a derivative of the Latin "Sophia", meaning wisdom, and Sylvan is also from Latin (sylvanus) meaning "of the woods". Words which hold a strong connection to both Fia, and the story told. 

This book was born from her lifelong love of reading and the inspiration taken from reading similar memoirs. She hopes to share in the tradition of giving voice to the voiceless and bringing darkness into the light.